A Booty Call Christmas

Da’Bridge Models

Mention ‘mistletoe’ and most people think of an insignificant leafy branch hanging over a doorway or from a ceiling.For tradition sake, people often sneak a kiss or two beneath it. However, this white-berried greenery can be more than a holiday ornament to a strategic mind with “game” to spare.  As a plant, mistletoe is a shameful parasite that clings to other living beings and sucks the life out of them in order to ensure its survival. booty2

Can’t you see the sexual relevance already?

Historically, the correct mistletoe etiquette is for the man to remove one berry when he kisses a woman. When all the berries are gone, there is no more kissing and the plant is discarded. However, as the years have passed, it’s myth and legend has evolved as well.  The once chivalrous connotation of its original introduction has been quietly replaced with a shorter view of holiday magic and sexy symbolism.

Today, the mistletoe is not a traditional representation of love and affection.  Millennium love is more concise in definition and yet fluid in its interpretation. Meaning, most people call any emotional connection love, but are really focused on one thing ..Sex!

To that end, this wonderful plant offers the perfect opportunity for “gamers” who are willing to take risks in order to recieve immense slash intense rewards.   For example, Have you ever been at a party…let’s say office Christmas party and saw someone you had crush on standing alone?  If you’re a “gamer”, you would begin to quickly locate the mistletoe and strategize on how to get them under it.  If your plan worked, you offered up just enough lip to suggest the best was yet to come. Well, why wait for situations like this?  Why be contained by office parties or lame club situations?

Take the initiative and reap a Christmas booty call this year!

The holiday season provides a wealth of opportunities to enjoy an explosive and intimate unHoly Night! Consider the divorcee down the street or the widower down the hall.  The possibilities are boundless for the keen minded or the quick witted opportunist. Statistics show that holiday loneliness plagues over 42% of the country.  That means there are millions of potential partners longing and needing some holiday love.  Why deny yourself the gift of giving them a part of you?  Consider it a memento for the season. You’ll be better for it and they’ll appreciate the gesture.

Since emotional bonds are strengthened faster than they are weakened, the “gamer” rules are critical during the holiday season.  Arrive at your unknowing holiday partner’s place at a respectable hour.. let’s say 5pm.  When they answer the door let em’ know you were thinking about them this season and wanted to stop by and say “hi”.  Have a potted plant or Christmas cookies in hand. These props are key to promoting the authenticity of your gesticulation. 

Keep the conversation short and sweet but layered with compliments and flirtatious subtleties.  The key is not to overstay, so timing is critical.  Once you made the right impression, offer a hint for a night cap.  Say something like “I got a copy of Hitch or Why Did I Get Married Too”, at the house.  “I am planning to watch it later. I can bring it over if you like to watch it with me?”   Make sure you use the Denzel smile when you ask…you know the one  where he barely opens his mouth to  flash a peek of those pearly whites….or if your a female, use the Vivica Fox, “I’m really a hoochie trying to act like a lady look”!

When they accept the invite, “game over”!  As the door closes, place a mistletoe above it for later.

When you arrive that night with the booty3movie and lavation in hand, the mistletoe will start the festivities.  The rest is natural science!  Consider yourself the bearer of holiday cheer for doing it. Just make sure you use protection that night..or “Away in a Manger” will be your holiday song next year!

DA’BRIDGE MODELS